SET YOUR PRIORITIES

SET YOUR PRIORITIES

Deuteronomy 6:4-9

Ephesians 4:11-16

 

11 The gifts he gave were that some would be apostles, some prophets, some evangelists, some pastors and teachers, 12 to equip the saints for the work of ministry, for building up the body of Christ, 13 until all of us come to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to maturity, to the measure of the full stature of Christ. 14 We must no longer be children, tossed to and fro and blown about by every wind of doctrine, by people’s trickery, by their craftiness in deceitful scheming. 15 But speaking the truth in love, we must grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ, 16 from whom the whole body, joined and knit together by every ligament with which it is equipped, as each part is working properly, promotes the body’s growth in building itself up in love.

 

In some ways the Deuteronomy passage states the obvious. We are better at things we prioritize.  If we wish to be proficient at anything, we must focus our energy, make it a priority and practice.  Malcolm Gladwell claims that it takes 10,000 hours of practice to turn a novice into an expert. That does not mean anyone can earn a Nobel prize or play on the PGA.  There are variables beyond focus, discipline and practice but without such effort, talent is far more likely wasted than developed.  We are certainly more likely to become who we can be with such effort.  Similarly, there is research that suggests it takes in the neighborhood of 500 facetime hours for a relationship to move from an acquaintance to an intimate friend.  There is no free lunch.  If you want depth and proficiency, it will require work.  It really helps if you enjoy it, and helps again if you have natural ability but there is no escaping the hours of work required.

It is no less true when we struggle with spiritual and religious issues.  In the pantheon of gods of ancient times, the Deuteronomists call us to put the Lord, the one God above all others.  Further, it calls us to create ways to remember that choice and ways to teach that choice.  In real life, we too, have many options.  In High School and college, I was a good student.  I enjoyed learning and my interests were diverse.  In my adolescent hubris, I believed I could do well at anything I applied myself to.  Life and advanced calculus put a hole in that theory, but as with anyone else, I had to make career choices before I really knew what I was getting into.  Almost every professional I know has had some serious soul searching in the middle of their 10,000 hours.  I remember questioning my choice to pursue pastoral counseling and stayed, not because of a perceived call, but  because I had already invested several thousand hours of training and the idea of starting over was simply too daunting.

There are not many people who proactively choose a god.  Most of us are so caught up in the activities of daily life, we are far more likely to be reactive rather than proactive.  Watching my children struggling to balance their personal and professional lives, find child care, find summer camps, encourage friend groups etc. etc. is a case in point.  It is difficult to choose an overarching set of priorities.  Those choices are being made but they are more likely to be revealed in our behaviors rather than our stated ideals.  

 

This is an ancient problem.  In my understanding, the Deuteronomist is saying choose love.  Never forget that in every aspect of living, your love is what matters.  It is easy to lose focus in the midst of real life,  Create reminders.  Talk about what matters most to you to your children.  Raise issues in every corner of your life—at home or away— when you lie down and when you wake.  Without such effort, you will be buffeted by the daily demands of living.  There will be so many detours, it will be much harder to find what you seek.  

To this day orthodox Jews use ritual and repetition.  They use concrete symbols (phylacteries, mezuzahs, daily prayer etc) to remind, to teach and to ‘keep their eye on the prize.’  In real life, it is more common to lose touch with these kinds of practices.  They become old fashioned, irrelevant and disconnected from their intended meaning.  Most of us are hard pressed to attend regular worship once a week, much less develop daily disciplines.  It takes a heck of a lot more years to accumulate 500 hours when we are having trouble investing even one hour a week.  

 

And all of this begs the question, ‘just what does it mean to love God with ‘all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your might.’   It’s a lot like saying ‘Mom’s are very important.’ Finding particular ways to love is a lot more concrete than looking for ways to remind us that loving is what matters.   The Ephesians passage sheds some light on this question.  

Here are some of the conclusions that emerged in our FIRL discussion of the passage.:

Submission is part of following.  We are yielding that someone else knows more than we do.  We are acknowledging we do not know it all.  That seems painfully obvious to me but the word ‘submission’ is almost a dirty word in our individualist society.  It is seen as a sign of weakness. It becomes “You can’t tell me what to do.”  But in real life, we do not have the time or the capacity to make all of our decisions independently. We rely upon other people’s knowledge all of the time.  Very few of us have gone to medical school.  But now, even following medical advice is suspect.  One of my favorite aphorisms is:  ‘You never have enough information to make an important decision’—closely followed by:  “You are still responsible for it.”  Real life is lived in uncertainty and constant discernment.  There is not enough education in the world to ensure correct decisions.  We can only improve our odds.  Every single profession and every single one of us will make serious errors.  We should not think otherwise. But living with that knowledge will allow us to be skeptical and careful without living in adversarial suspicion of authority.  

Humans want to make different statements of relative value rather than identifiers of our uniqueness.  Every part of our body is important.  All parts of the body work together.  Each part of the body has a unique function—to say any part is more important is a false distinction.  It is true we can live without some of our limbs but the whole body suffers from the loss.  We have a terrible time giving up our need to determine worth by making comparisons.  Who is better?  Who is more important?  How do we measure up?  Such thinking keeps us on the  treadmill of needing to prove ourselves.  This is not the way God loves and it is not the way Jesus cared for others.  

Though there is important scripture which tells us we must become as little children to enter the kingdom, this scripture suggests the opposite.  This scripture says we must grow up, we must mature.  It is not ok to live childishly, child like, perhaps—but not childishly.  We are childish when we insist on our own way without seeing how our choices affect others.  We are childish when we want what we want and want it now. We are childish when we take everything personally.  We are childish when we gossip, backbite and when we bully.  It takes a fair amount of maturity to be respectful of a view we disagree with.  It takes even more maturity to stand secure when we are recipients of bad behavior.  These are the directions of loving when we seek to love God with our whole heart, soul and might.

This does not mean we automatically defer to the needs of others.  It does mean we must take them into account.  We must be constantly discerning.  Humans get into absurd arguments about our ‘rights’ without seriously considering what is the right thing to do.  Everyone benefits when everyone matters and is taken into account.  In the short run and on the basis of immediate gain, that might not be true.  But unless we are mindful of the whole, our selfishness will destroy our planet.  The only way I know around that reality is to die before you see the consequences. 

 

In choosing the Christian life, Christians put love first (we fail at that one too but that is the goal).  And more particularly we choose to love as Jesus loved.  Jesus pointed out that human ways of valuing don’t work, lead to polarization, self importance, entitlement and self righteousness. When we submit to God’s way of loving, we are transformed.  A client of mine, who is not particularly religious, shared a cartoon with me that makes the point eloquently: A man is standing before God and asks:  Will you make me into someone who is lovable?  God does not hesitate.  There is a sudden large cloud of smoke.  As the smoke clears, the man starts to examine himself and says:  “Nothing has changed.”  God replies.  “That’s the point.” If only we could see ourselves as God sees us, we would be transformed.

That is what it means to follow him.  Let it be so.